Friday, May 21, 2010

Ranting on Kids Sports

The out-of-control state of kids' sports has been addressed in the media and cyberspace ad nauseum, but I'm going to add my two cents because I'm really fired up. And it takes a lot to get me fired up.


This beef of mine started years ago when Ian was little. Really little. Like three or four-years-little. That's how young they start soccer and t-ball. Sure, it might be fun for the kids (though hell for the parents to sit through), but the downside is that
  1. If your child doesn't play from year one, they'll already be out of the loop and at a disadvantage when they try to start playing at age seven
  2. If your child stinks at age five, they will lose confidence and interest in the game before they're even old enough to understand it and reach their potential.

But, Rob and I are go with the flow kinda people so we threw our kids into this mess as soon as they met the age requirement. Needless to say, I can't bitch too much about a system I'm part of.

For the last couple years, I've been particularly frustrated with the leadership in one of my children's sports leagues. (I'm being purposely vague.)  This individual runs the league as if the players are working toward Olympic gold. We have trainers from other countries, for cryin' out loud. And don't get me started on the expense. Being on this person's "A" team sounds like a punishment, particularly if you're not performing at the level expected. I heard recently that one player was criticized for "looking like an A level player during tryouts, but not playing like one during the games." And players have been known to make the A team based on relationships versus skills. But hey, that's life, so why not start with kids sports. I need to be realistic.

Today, I learned that a friend's child did not make either of the league's fall teams for which they held tryouts last month. And for me, this could be the straw that breaks the proverbial camel's back. The official explanation is that there were too many children for two teams ("A" and "B") and not enough for a third team. I think that's crap. No child should be cut from a team at age nine. Add to the rosters of the A and B teams if you have to, even if it means less playing time for each child. At least on the more reasonable B team, the kids want to have fun and be with their friends, more than they care about winning state championships. I think if asked they would happily add to their numbers so every child had a chance to play.

But therein lies the problems with kids sports. Somewhere along the line it became more about the parents than the children. I imagine the system would be much more fair and enjoyable for everyone concerned if we let kids make the rules.

Your thoughts?

5 comments:

Bob Alek said...

I agree. Kids used to play sports without any adult involvement. With the so called "organized sports" we have nowadays the adults are trying to relive their childhoods at their kids expense. I attended some junior, midget, tiny tot, football games several years ago when my daughter was trying the cheerleader thing (don't get me going on that). Big beefy grown men were screaming (not yelling) I mean screaming at these 5 and 6 year old players at the top of their lungs throughout the games...uhg it was very disturbing. It made me so angry I couldn't continue to watch without doing something I would regret.

Kim Graham said...

Kim... I totally agree. Whatever happened to playing Kick the Can and Baby, Baby in the Air? So far my kids seem to enjoy everything, but that's because Dick coaches anything Reese is a part of and Hope (so far) has had good luck and is naturally competitive enough to enjoy it. Maybe with Weston, I'll finally start the playground league I've always been talking about. Kids sign up, pay $5 for a t-shirt and a medal at the end (I'm convinced that's why they want to do stuff) and then each Saturday you show up at your assigned playground and...play.

James Wood said...

I agree with you Kim. My daughter Jillian just started playing 8-9 year old coach pitch softball this year. The coaches encourage the girls to do their best and even praise them when they can't get the ball to first base for the out fast enough. I hear more "Good try...good hustle"...than screaming and yelling. Every girl gets to play all positions and bat in an inning regardless of how many outs. No one ever mentions the score at the end. This is the model everyone should use - It should all be about having fun.

Emily said...

You know I am totally with you here. C'mon people, do you really think it's a good practice to cut a kid when she's 9??? Does it make you happy to crush the soul of a 9 year old? How about if it were YOUR 9 year old? You can't construe this as sour grapes because its not my kid but I don't think I would want my child playing for a league with that attitude. Life is short. Stick with winners -- and nothing sounds more defeating than the situation you described. Good for you for calling it what it is.

Lara said...

Kim great post!!!! It is a shame that our community supports this sort of behavior. In addition to the parents it is also is more about the board of directors than the kids.