In Need of a Good De-Grinching

Aside from setting out a few Christmas-y dust collectors and loading up the tree with the dozens of ornaments we've collected over the years, I do not deck the halls for the holidays. I consider decorating to be a form of arts & crafts, which is among the many maternal skill sets I lack. I thought this shortcoming would become less important once the kids grew up, but alas, Abby has once again voiced her disappointment at our Grinch-like abode.

Truth be told, I feel rather Grinch-like and it's not just the depression that's keeping me green and grumpy. I've felt ho-hum about the holidays for years now. I'm not sure where things went wrong for me. Perhaps when the kids became too old for toys (or at least toys that don't cost hundreds of dollars)? Perhaps when I became too old for toys? Perhaps when Christmas getaways began taking the place of gift-giving? Perhaps when I decided the loneliness of a mere family of four at the holidays was too big a bummer to bother truly celebrating? Perhaps when the radio stations started playing Christmas music before Thanksgiving and the stores decorated for the holiday in October? Regardless of the cause, I've definitely lost the passion for Christmas, which means I'm obviously missing the reason for the season.

This year I'm going to try something different. In an attempt to beat the Grinch at his own game, I'm going to decorate my heart and soul with 25 daily gifts of love. Wow, that sounds super corny, but work with me here. I'm thinking that rather than an advent calendar counting down to Christmas with chocolates, I'm going to remind myself daily of all the gifts I already have in my life. One gift each day, recorded in my journal so I can reflect on it. And to share the love, which is the whole point of Christmas (remember?) from December 1-25 I'm also going to "gift" my family with simple reminders of why I love them. My hope is that I can think of 25 reasons for each of them this countdown will fill my heart with the joy of the season.

I'd love to hear about the special ways you celebrate Christmas/Hanukkah. And if you want to get together over the holidays, give a call. Time spent with friends is one of the greatest gifts of all!

Making Christmas Merry in Mexco

Over the Christmas holiday, I had the good fortune to be in Riviera Maya, Mexico with my family -- Rob, the kids, my sister, her husband and son, and my parents. While my sister has been taking these Christmas vacations for years (she doesn't love us enough to come home from Denver for the holidays), this was a first for me and my clan. We left on Christmas morning, having opened what was supposed to be a very small number of gifts the night before. (Rob has trouble following directions and had way too many presents for me -- granted, I had asked suggested casually mentioned each item in the weeks leading up to the big day.) Despite having worshiped at church (those of you who did not witness MPC's 5 p.m. children's service missed out on an Oscar-worthy freakin' angel performance), gathered with friends for a couple hours of merriment, and exchanged gifts at home on Christmas Eve, it stopped feeling like Christmas the minute we reached Philly's airport. Arriving in Mexico did nothing to add to the spirit of the season. Maybe it was the signs that read "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Gift." I guess you have to give them credit for openly stating what is the true meaning of the holiday for many people.

Photos by Abby MacPherson

Once at the Riu Palace resort, my spirits were slightly buoyed by the Christmas tree and the manger scene in the lobby (and the Corona I had on the ride there probably helped, too), but as the day progressed I had serious doubts as to whether I would again take a trip over the holiday. The palm trees, clear blue water and 80 degree temperatures just didn't feel right. However, by the time my sister and her family arrived the next day, I had settled in quite nicely. It's amazing what you can deal with when you're forced to adjust to new surroundings. I know; you hate me right now.

Lest you think it was all sunshine and rainbows, I should tell you that it rained for most of one afternoon and a couple of evenings. Plus, Rob and I ended up sharing a bed with a teenager. Fortunately, we knew him or that would have been extra awkward. (The resort's definition of a suite differed from mine.) But besides that, there was no little family drama. The kids didn't rarely got on my nerves. I didn't fight with my sister at all. And having given up dairy products on the advice of my physician, I didn't even find myself doubled over in the bathroom at any point in the trip! The wine was lousy, but the pina coladas were drinkable, and I even discovered a new, more adult beverage -- the Caipirinha.

Other highlights of the trip included amazing sugar donuts at the buffet, surprisingly good pancakes, and mimosas every morning at breakfast. Oh, and the warm, magnificent water of the Caribbean Sea, a snorkeling expedition complete with sea turtles and a large stingray, and colorful sunrises and sunsets weren't too shabby either. As for entertainment, well, we brought along our gift for words, with the youngest family members delivering the biggest zingers. Here, in no particular order, are the most memorable lines from Viva la Vida 2013:

Nana, your arms are squishy; you need to work out. -- William, age 5

Ian, you can come to the pool with me because you're my friend and my cousin. -- William

I play the pan flute. -- Ian

It's like shooting fish in a barrel. -- A nationally competitive rifleman who then proceeded to miss his first three target shots with a BB gun during the resort's daily competition. (Side note: Ian turned out to be quite the marksman! He won the competition on our last day there, making Pop Pop very proud.)

Is B-E, "beh," a word? -- Ian, while playing Bananagrams

I'm not tired, just resting here on Pop Pop

I'm not tired, I'm just rubbing my eyes -- an exhausted William

They're in case I need to climb over something. -- Abby, in response to why she was wearing gym shorts under her dress

I don't like Abby so much anymore. -- William, after he and Abby had a "disagreement" over sand castle building.

Ten years ago I would have had that. -- My dad, upon missing yet another beach volleyball strike

I was looking for olives. -- William, when asked why he took so long at the buffet and came back with an empty plate

Fun Kim is coming out tonight! -- Brother-in-law Rob in response to Kim ordering a second drink

There's a fun Kim? -- Abby, in response to Uncle Rob

Ah yes, good stuff.

I told Rob that this whole Christmas vacation thing may prove to have been a bad idea, because I just know I'll the kids will expect to go somewhere every year. He said we'll just have to tell them that that's not going to be the case. And boy, was I were they bummed to hear that.

The trip concluded with a lovely six-hour stay in the Cancun airport when our flight was delayed, but we still made it home in time to bring in the New Year with friends. Happy New Year to you and yours!

Toes selfie

Random Musings, Volume 5

After Tuesday's post, let's keep it light today with a new edition of Random Musings.

1. Why do people buy the super cheap toilet paper when it just requires you to use 5x as much to wipe? Even I buy decent toilet paper, and that's saying something.
2. Speaking of bathrooms, in your office restroom, do you wait in the stall until everyone else has left? Because, yikes!, what if they heard you? These are the same people who flush while they're going because their bodily noises are so much different from the rest of ours.
3. One more bathroom-related thought: Despite hand soap having been in liquid or foaming form for years, I still wet my hands first. I have no idea whether this is necessary.
4. It can be difficult to get your husband's attention at times. One surefire way to get him to speak to you is to reduce the number of sports channels you get in your cable package. Of course, there's no guarantee you're going to like what he says.

5. Don't you love bite-size candy? Did you know bite-size is industry lingo for "they'll eat lots more this way?"
6. Why do we still sign credit card slips? Is someone actually looking at them?
7. Buffets are a bad idea for cheap frugal people. We They overeat just to get our their money's worth.
8. Is there a rule regarding how many days or weeks have to pass before you can wear the same outfit to school or work again?
9. I love that boots are so popular. My mismatched socks have been given new life.
10. I don't mind looking unpresentable when going out in public in the area where I currently live, but I wouldn't be caught dead looking that way when I'm out in public in my hometown. You just don't want the people who knew you 25 years ago to think you've fallen apart. The people who know you now assume you've always looked that way. 

Finally, I leave you with two bonus musings with a Christmas theme:

1. Please don't put a to-from sticker on the gift bag you're using for my present (subliminal message). You realize I want to reuse that bag, right? I'm running dangerously low, and may be forced to purchase some. Gasp!
2. If the gift you're giving requires batteries, for God's sake include them! The same applies to the necessary items for juicers (fruit), journals (a nice pen), and televisions (a year's worth of cable television).

Now it's time for you to log off and mail me a check for the Silvertones Twelfth Night Revelry on Jan. 12. Don't miss it!

Happy Thoughts? I Must Have the Wrong Blog...

Alright, I admit it. For much of this year, I've been a grouch, a grump, and most recently a Grinch. It's a wonder the two of you still read my blog. In an effort to get in your good graces before 2011 comes to a close, I'd like to share some happy thoughts on this eve of Christmas Eve: 

• Abby and friends surrounding my dining room table, flour everywhere, cookie cutters scattered about, sprinkles at the ready, crafting the yummiest part of Christmas. 
• Christmas cards from friends near and far. For many years I've been saving those photo cards of friends' children. I enjoy the nostalgic trip down memory lane when I see how the years have turned them from mere babes to youth and young adults. 
• The Christmas tree. Yes, decorating was on my list of bah humbugs in my Dec. 8 post, but there's something about hanging the ornaments on the tree that warms the heart of even a Grinch like me. I especially love those that remind me of family vacations and special getaways, and others that mark my wedding day and baby's first Christmas. And then there are the priceless handmade gems from the kids' early years of Sunday school classes.
• My annual theatrical performance. Not to be confused with my daily dramas. For the past two years, I've been asked to participate in the skit for the children's Christmas Eve church service. Last year was my big debut when I impressed children and theater critics alike with my convincing performance of an evergreen tree. This year I am playing the role of "Stage Manager" for "Idol Schmidel," a singing competition where the audience helps select the Next False Idol. Get it? I'll be signing autographs after the service which begins at 5:00 p.m. 
• And speaking of church, Advent Sundays with Pastor Bill's messages of Faith, Hope, Joy and Love have provided important reminders of what the season is all about.

As wonderful as these thoughts and experiences are, my favorite Christmas moment occurred this morning while reading the newspaper. Yes, you read that right. The newspaper, a daily harbinger of gloom and doom, manages to find plenty of stories of goodness and charity and hope and love during the Christmas season. In today's Philadelphia Inquirer, I was moved by these stories:

• In Coatesville, an anonymous donor had 40 turkeys he decided should go to the city's most-deserving residents. Police officer Rodger Ollis decided to have some fun with the opportunity, and gave the gift to those who had performed a public service or were simply "caught doing something right."
• A body shop in Woodbury refurbished a car for a previously homeless woman who supported her sons and put a roof over their heads with her job at McDonald's. Each day, regardless of the weather, she took the bus to her job and to her children's caregiver, never complaining about the inconveniences. The expense of a car was never within reach.  She's astounded by her newfound freedom, a freedom most of us never consider. 
• Across the country, Layaway Angels have been paying off others' balances at stores like Kmart and Walmart. 
• In Cheltenham, Enon Tabernacle Baptist Church paid the $68,000 tab of hundreds of shoppers who'd bought clothes on layaway at the Burlington Coat Factory.
• David Pincus passed away from leukemia on Wednesday. The 85-year-old humanitarian devoted himself to relieving the suffering of children. The paper described him as "fond of basset hounds, stiff martinis, athletics, and monumental acts of generosity." Now there's a guy I'd have liked to know.

What if the newspaper shared an equally uplifting story every day of the year? Would more of us be inspired to give back, to help someone in need, to simply appreciate the gifts we've been given?

Here's wishing you and yours a most Merry Christmas and a New Year full of goodness, charity, hope, and love!

Anticipation or Angst?

For the past few years, the Christmas season has thrown me into an emotional and mental tailspin. My inner Grinch first appears when I see retailers' holiday displays in October, and hear carols before we've reached Thanksgiving. By the time Black Thursday night rolls around, I'm in quite a state (You crazy shoppers can't even wait till Friday morning at 5:00 a.m.?)

As a Christian, this time leading up to Christmas (also known as Advent) is supposed to be about the waiting, the anticipation of the birth of Christ. The societal madness, however, turns it into a time of rushing and decorating and shopping and planning; the complete opposite of waiting. I'm sure if I was a better Christian I could just overlook the craziness of the season and focus my heart and mind on Jesus. Instead, I get grumpy.

A major factor in my grumpiness is the whole gift-giving aspect of Christmas. Each year my children provide me with their wish lists (which I confess to requesting), and each year that list is made up of more expensive items than the year before. This causes me a good deal of frustration because:

1. If I cut back on the number of gifts since they cost more, the tree will look bare and the kids will be disappointed in having just a couple items to open.
2. Since they were mere babes, I have been conditioning them to expect a substantial pile of loot and I can't do a 180 now.
3. These gifts will mean nothing to them in a year (I'll be lucky if they interest them that long). I'm willing to bet neither of them can remember what they received last Christmas.
4. There are so many children in this world, country, state, and in nearby communities who have nothing. Kids who are asking Santa for food, a home, a job for an unemployed parent.  
5. My children already have so much.

It's not that my children are undeserving of gifts or unappreciative of what they receive. They're both great kids (when they're not trying to kill each other). It's just that I can't get past the thought of those in need. Even buying gifts for those less fortunate, which I do for church and work, doesn't ease my discomfort.

I think another factor in my grouchiness is the sense of obligation I feel during this season. I have to decorate the house. I have to send Christmas cards. I have to make a real meal if it's my turn to play hostess. I have to buy gifts for my kids, my nephew and nieces, my parents, and my husband. It's not that I dislike decorating, sending cards, or buying gifts (although I do dislike cooking), but I like to do these things when the spirit moves me. I enjoy giving someone a gift to surprise them, to show my love when they least expect it. Hitting Amazon.com and ordering a bunch of stuff just doesn't have the same appeal.

Finally, Christmas Day goes by too quickly and with too little fanfare. Ironic, isn't it? The build up is overwhelming and the day-of falls flat. Opening gifts takes all of 15 minutes and then everyone goes to their separate corners to play with their new toys. The rest of the day is just like any other with a fairly quiet "real meal" with my parents or Rob's family thrown in. I wish I could spend Christmas surrounded by large numbers of family and friends with laughter, food, drink, music, and merriment. Invitations being accepted at macshimer@gmail.com.

I know many of you have been reading this saying to yourself, "These are your choices, Kim. You don't have to do anything." In theory, you're right. In reality, it's not that simple.

I welcome your suggestions on how I can make the entire season of Christmas merry. My husband and kids would appreciate your advice!

I'm a Rule Breaker, Dream Taker

Obviously I'm not setting a good example for my children if I can't follow my own rules. I even shared them with you back on November 22. Number three of my "5 Essential Children's Gift Giving Guidelines" clearly stated, "Carefully consider your purchase if this toy, craft, or gadget requires parental supervision or assistance." But did I listen? Noooo. Not even close. Now I'm burdened with the unpleasant task of returning one of Abby's Christmas gifts, incurring the return shipping charge in addition to the shipping I already paid to receive it in the first place.

So you're probably wondering what the offending gift is/was, right? Hold on to your hats.
It is/was a sewing machine.

Dear Lord, what was I thinking? Not only did this gift require parental supervision and assistance, but it required it from someone who actually knows how to work a sewing machine. This is not me. I don't know if I've ever used a sewing machine in my life. Abby pulled it out of the box at my insistence (she seemed to be avoiding it, probably knowing the fun we weren't going to have with it), and within ten minutes I asked her if she'd mind if I returned it. She agreed it wasn't worth the hassle and informed me that "sewing by hand is easier anyway." I don't know how to sew by hand either, so I'm not sure where she developed her skills. Anyway, today the sewing machine is being returned to Back to Basics Toys.

Unfortunately, the sewing machine was not the only toy I bought which broke rule #3. I also purchased for Abby the American Girl Pom Pom Scarves Kit which requires parental help in measuring 42' strands of yarn, and multiple hands to untangle balls of said yarn that become completely knotted if you look at them wrong. We finally finished this darn scarf and she hasn't even worn it.

And then there is Ductigami: The Art of the Tape, a book of crafts one can make with duct tape. Ian has showed no interest in it whatsoever, and Abby is finding it more challenging than anticipated. This means she wants Rob or me to help. This is highly undesirable as noted in rule #3. 

On a positive note (you know I'm always looking for the positive in every situation), Abby did receive one gift requiring participation that I actually am enjoying. Her Aunt Andi bought her Pictureka, a fun game of visual hide and seek. Best thing about this game is that being the little observational savant that she is, Abby always wins. That means I don't have to listen to her cry about losing.


Time to confess, who else broke rule #3 on the gift giving guidelines? Or did you blow it on:

1. A toy that can be used to inflict bodily harm on siblings, pets, or parents
2. An item with multiple parts
3. A gift requiring batteries which you forgot to have available on Christmas morning
4. An item requiring considerable assembly which you left to assemble until midnight on Christmas Eve

Do tell!

Holiday Eating Tips

In all the years 359 days since I've been blogging, I've never stolen someone's writing and passed it off as my own. I've stolen borrowed plenty of pictures illegally, but never words. Today, I'm making an exception. I have no idea who wrote this, but the style and humor is much like my own, and frankly I've got other stuff to do to get ready for Christmas. So, without further ado, leave you with these...

HOLIDAY EATING TIPS

1.  Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare. You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:  "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate and wine in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO what a ride!'" 

Merry Christmas to you and yours!  

                                                          Love, A Freakin' Angel

Sounds of the Season

You don't need ALL the Christmas cookies for the party, do you?

I just thought of something else I want for Christmas.

Mom, I can't find my white shirt or bow tie. I need it now. My concert dress rehearsal is today.

Please close the front door so we're not paying to heat the outside of the house.

Turn off that stupid Dominic the Donkey song.

Darn. Noah can't come over tonight. It's Hanukkah. (Repeat eight times)

Mom, what do you want for Christmas? It's not fair that you get me all kinds of stuff and I don't get you anything.  (Seriously!)

A box came from Amazon.com with my name on it. Can I open it?

The Fraternal Order of Police is on the phone. They want some money. The deacon's fund at church is low. They want some money. That non-profit sent Christmas-y return address labels. They want some money. 

Are the Jones's on our Christmas card list? We just got one from them.

Maddie peed downstairs again.

I know we don't want to spend $6,000 right now, but the high efficiency furnace tax rebate ends Dec. 31.

Honey, let's not exchange gifts this year. Instead we'll give each other a high efficiency heater.

Mom, my nose is stuffy and my lips are chapped. Do I have to go to school?

Who ate all the cookies??!!  

I know where you're hiding the presents this year.

I hope lots of Freakin' Angels readers donate a kitchen item per my last blog post.

Before he became a werewolf

I don't know why the Phils let Jayson Werth go (though the Nationals definitely overpaid); go talk to my husband.  

What sounds of the season are you hearing these days?

Looking for a Warm and Fuzzy Feeling this Christmas?

Had my very own Christmas miracle this past weekend. Remember how I revealed my inner Grinch last week, specifically referencing the yearly Christmas tree debacle? Well on Saturday the Christmas tree curse officially lifted. Rob, Abby, and I hit the usual Boy Scout Christmas tree lot and found a beauty, complete with nature's decorations -- pine cones, straw, and leaves. We took it home, set in the tree stand, and voila! It fit perfectly, requiring no sawing or shaving or cursing. And it actually stood straight from the get-go! And it wasn't too tall! I get a warm and fuzzy feeling every time I look at it.

You know what else gives me a fuzzy feeling this time of year? Doing something nice for others. Quit laughing, I'm serious. Want to feel fuzzy with me? Please join me in helping two families from my area who are spending this Christmas season in a domestic abuse shelter. After 30 days in the shelter they will move to an apartment with little more than the clothes on their backs. I'm asking all Freakin' Angels readers to provide kitchen supplies for these two families to take to their new apartments. Here's how you can help:

• Purchase a kitchen item (plates, glasses, silverware, dish towels, bowls, pots, pans, etc.) and either:
• Send it to me if you're out of town
• Drop it off at my home if you're local
• Let me know when and where to pick it up (we can do lunch!)
• Drop it off at my parents' house in Palmer Twp if you're a Lehigh Valley friend
• Send me a donation for a gift and I'll shop on your behalf

Thankfully most of us will never know what it's like to be without a safe and happy place to call home. Let's see if together we can make this Christmas just a wee bit brighter for two families in need.

Details: (I'm trying to be as private as possible with my contact info since this is out in cyberspace.)

1. Sending a gift? Please plan to have it in my hands by 12/19/10. If you want me to shop for you, please send any monetary contribution by 12/17/10 (checks payable to Kim Shimer).
2. My address for mailing: Kim Shimer, Judson Press, P.O. Box 851, Valley Forge, PA 19482. If you need a street address, please contact me.
3. Interested in dropping something off at my parent's house?  Email me to make arrangements.
4. To contact me to arrange a pick up or drop off, please send an email.
5. Other questions? Send me an email or call me if you have my number.

Thank you all  in advance for your contributions. You really are angels!

Six Grinch-Inducing Aspects of the Month of Christmas

Note: This post was written in the throes of my post-turkey-and-filling funk. I'm happy to report my mood did improve over the weekend, albeit only slightly.

I tell myself, "Don't write when you're grumpy." But then the smart ass inside of me chimes in with "Well then when would you write?" Alas, I'm grumpy today. It's Black Friday, it's dreary outside, I've spent the morning cleaning, and my sporadic attempts at online shopping have been fruitless. I also seem to have infected Rob's Dell laptop with whatever computer poison apparently leaks from my fingertips as I type. Oh, and have I mentioned that I've got a 2:00 p.m. appointment with my Dell technician as we attempt to rebuild my computer from the operating system on up? Good stuff.

So as I sit here and self-medicate analyze, I have determined that my lousy mood is a product of my inner Grinch. If it was up to me, Christmas would look more like Thanksgiving, but with a grander tribute to baby Jesus. We would gather with family and friends and we would eat, drink, and be merry, but that's all that would be required. We would know we were dealing with your basic one-night stand, and that would be okay. As it is now, the month of Christmas stresses me out. Here are the contributing factors:

• Black Friday. As someone who rarely if ever enjoys the shopping experience, Black Friday terrifies me. I hate the traffic. I hate the crowds. I think the idea of waking up at 4:00 a.m. to spend money is ludicrous. But I also feel that if I don't bite the bullet and get out there I'm going to miss the deals of the century. And the cheapskate in me whispers "Just do it!" (For the record, I ignored the cheapskate and stayed home.)
• Decorating. I don't enjoy decorating. This bothers Abby considerably. Her friends' moms decorate for all the holidays. I don't find it to be a good use of my time. But letting Abby do the decorating messes with my need to control things in this house. Quite a conundrum.
• The tree. The focal point of the decorating. I don't mind the tree itself, but bringing it in the house and setting it up is akin to a home improvement job...someone usually ends up yelling or swearing. We invariably buy one that's too tall and needs to have its trunk trimmed, and then getting it straight is like trying to fix my damn laptop...darn near impossible.
• Enough (with the) Presents? Determining how many presents to buy always causes me anxiety. Frankly, I hate that my kids want so much when they already have so much. And I never know when enough is enough. It's especially challenging now that everything they want costs a small fortune. And do I keep it fair by quantity or monetary value? I liked it a lot better when they were too young to request anything and a cardboard box couple small gifts sufficed.
• Online shopping. I greatly prefer online shopping to hitting the actual store. The downside to this is that it contributes to my Grinchy mood. No music, no decorations. I also have a need to avoid shipping charges, which means I buy more than I really want just so I hit the necessary minimum. I think they call this "penny wise, pound foolish."
• The letdown. We spend a month gearing up for what generally lasts for 30 minutes on Christmas morning. Within 15 minutes of all the presents being opened I feel a tremendous let down. The kids run off to play with their new gadgets, I clean up the discarded wrapping paper, and there's nothing to look forward to for the next six days until New Year's Eve. This letdown is  probably not as bad if you have a large family to visit, but that doesn't apply to us. So we sit. And sometimes we go to the movies.

As a faith-filled, church-going Christian, you would think I would get more out of the Christmas season. But then again, perhaps its because I'm a faith-filled, church-going Christian that I feel such disappointment with the holiday as I've been living it. I know in my heart that it's supposed to be about so much more than the gifts, the cards, and the decorations, yet that's where the focus is.

So, Freakin' Angel readers, share with me your suggestions on how I can replace my inner Grinch with the hope, love, joy, and peace that the season is really supposed to be about. Looking forward to hearing from you...

5 Essential Children's Gift Giving Guidelines

"It's the most wonderful time of the year." If you're a kid, that is. If you're a mom with school age children the most wonderful time of the year is early September. As a parent I'll grant Christmastime 2nd place status with apologies to baby Jesus, though if he'd had kids, he would probably agree with me.

This weekend I looked through some of the dozen or so toy catalogs I've received in the past couple weeks. Abby has been kind enough to go through a couple of them, circling everything she wants. There were some requests that amused me, like the mini trampoline meant for 3-year-olds and the inflatable limbo stick; some I expected, like the friendship bracelet, jewelry, and scarf kits; and a few I'm giving consideration but have doubts about, including the sewing machine and pottery wheel.

Purchasing toys for children is an art and has very little to do with pleasing the recipient. As a public service, particularly for new parents, here are my guidelines for toy buying:

• Determine if this toy can be used to inflict bodily harm on siblings, pets, or parents. While almost any toy can be used as a weapon, you definitely want to stay away from pens, pencils, bow and arrows, BB guns, suspenders, Wii controllers, balls, bats, Nerf guns, Nerf swords, paintball guns, paintbrushes, rulers, Cutco knives, remote control cars, and paper airplane or origami kits.
• Anything with multiple parts should be avoided at all costs, and the smaller the parts, the more they should be avoided. This is particularly true when all the parts are necessary for the game or toy to function properly. Legos, K'nex, and Lincoln Logs are more acceptable because you can use them regardless of whether a few pieces go missing. 
• Carefully consider your purchase if this toy, craft, or gadget requires parental supervision or assistance. If you're one of those engaged parents who enjoys making treats with an Easy Bake Oven, melting crayons into car shapes, or sewing small handbags, than this warning does not apply to you. My idea of having fun with the kids is to take their money playing Texas Hold 'Em, otherwise, please leave me out of it. (Hence my reservations about the pottery wheel and sewing machine.)
• Does it require batteries? We go through batteries faster than milk and bread in our house. 'Nuf  said.
• And finally, unless you are married to my dad (and I'm hoping that distinction only applies to my mom), do not purchase any gift that requires assembly. If you fail to heed my advice on this, at least assure me that you won't wait until 12:30 a.m. on December 25 to begin putting the beast together. No child should be woken up in the middle of the night by the sounds of swearing coming from under the Christmas tree. 

Here's hoping your holiday shopping is safe, successful, and doesn't put you in debt.

And if I've missed any valuable gift-giving guidelines for children, please feel free to comment!