This happens to be the case for me with nearly every controversial topic you can think of.
I live my life in shades of gray.
Once upon a time, life was simpler. I grew up with parents who took a clear black & white stance on every important topic. I loved and respected them so I agreed with their views. I'm not sure it ever occurred to me to challenge them. But then I went and got myself an education and this is how my father reacted to the new post grad school Kim:
"I would have never encouraged you to get an education if I'd known it was going to screw you up like this."That about sums it up. I'm educated but messed up. Whether we are talking about politics, race, religion, sexuality, economics, or raising children, I'm likely to see more than one perspective on the issue. This has become frustrating not only for my dad but for me as well. I don't like living in shades of gray. I keep thinking that if only I could access every available piece of information on a topic I could make a decision or take a stand. But instead, the more I learn, the more confused I get. Every time I think I've come to a conclusion, someone presents a counterpoint and I can see the value in it as well. And don't point me toward the Bible because any belief that one holds can be supported if you select the right Scriptures. You need only look at the myriad of religious views even within the Protestant church to see what I mean. I'm one well-educated, Christian, wishy-washy mess who can't take part in intelligent conversations because they stress me out. Political elections are a complete nightmare for someone like me. If it's true that "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything," I'm afraid I'm destined for a tumble.
I may start a "Shades of Gray" support group. I think it's a good idea, though I'm sure if you disagree with the concept I'll be able to see the value of your opinion...
7 comments:
And just what is wrong with "the middle ground"? This brings me to the point of choosing favorites... why discount other options, why must one be the best? So, therefore, to live in a shade of grey means that you hold great patience, understanding, respect and caring for others. Would that the world had more of you, there would be far less battles and more genuine conversations of mutual understanding and respect for differences.
Great post! I would join -- I, too, am a raging moderate and proud of it. But we should be an advocacy group -- because support suggests that we need fixing. I think people who only see one side are the ones that need the support. :)
Count me in as a founding member. Kim, that could have been writing everything you just said, if I were that good a writer: ditto my family, ditto discussions in public with other people, ditto voting in elections. A history teacher at my school once said during a lunch time discussion, "Everything is black or white; there is NO grey area!!!" I'd hate to be sitting in that guy's classroom, because for me it's all grey. I am, in addition, very bothered by people who can't consider the other side, whichever one that might be. There are ALWAYS two sides, I think. I would make a terrible politician. But politicians and their staunch supporters bother me, too, because so many people seem to just toe the party line no matter what. Makes my blood boil.
There. End of rant. What are the membership dues?
Are you lutheran? everything is gray for us....LOL GRAY IS GOOD! sounds like the first t-shirt for the group...:) keep writing <3 it!
dove gray, steel gray, pewter, blue gray -- nuance: it's a good thing -- glad to find your blog, Kim
I never would have guessed that from your Dad. Ha Ha. I'm with you though I think I'm a conservative, but I have some liberal ideas too. So I guess I am as middle of the road as you can get. Makes it easier to not make a decision.
You are a quintessential postmodern, Kim! We don't just recognize 2 sides to every issue. We shoot the issues through a multifaceted prism and marvel at the array of colors that emerge!
I have to admit, emotionally, I lean toward the B&W. But as an educated thinker and as an emerging theologian, I love the shifting nuances found in the shadows between light and dark.
I agree with Emily: we should be an advocacy group, not a support group. But I'd go a step further and exhort "Shades of Gray" to stop apologizing and avoiding and start engaging in those conversations, encouraging others to listen to one another, discover a new angle, and explore a different perspective. Imagine if we used our education, intellect, and passion to make thing "right" for as many people as possible--instead of insisting that everyone who doesn't see it my way is "wrong." Maybe we can offer the world a paradigm for making compromise a tool of empowerment--and not a flag of surrender.
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