For about five years now, I have been hiring a college student from my church to watch my children during the summer. First came Laura Jean who was followed by her brother Kevin who was followed this year by Nicole. Each has been an upstanding, intelligent, fun, and responsible young adult...with a driver's license (the #1 requirement for the job).
Now here's the confession: Each has done a much better job of disciplining my children and taking care of my home than I do. And the sordid part: I've come to rely on this. Oh, let's be honest, I've started
- I can never get Ian to stick to the pediatrician-recommended one hour of screen time each day. I simply can't deal with the argument we have when I suggest "powering down." But babysitters and other in-charge adults somehow get our children to listen. So Nicole has been instructed to limit Ian to two hours of screen time a day (who are we kidding on the one-hour suggestion?) and I bet she'll have way more success with this than I do.
- Getting them to clean their rooms is also an exercise in futility. The whining and moaning are unbearable and I've decided that keeping their doors closed is easier. But if I tell Nicole to have the kids clean up their rooms before heading to the pool, I'll I bet you dollars to donuts that they will be clean when I get home (and on a side note, where does the expression "dollars to donuts" come from?)
- Assignments in general are better delivered by anyone other than mom or dad. I'm not above leaving Nicole a note to "Have the kids sweep the patio, bring in the trashcans, empty the dishwasher, and put their laundry away." It's amazing how much more is accomplished when I'm not in charge!
I hereby bestow my summer childcare providers with the esteemed titles of Freakin' Angels! Anyone in your life you feel deserves the title these days?
6 comments:
Hooray! Yes, I'd like to nominate my Dad who is volunteering at Boy Scout Camp all this week at the Newlin Grist Mill. He has been driving my son to and from camp, keeping track of the other campers, and having a great time hiking the trails. It's special people like my Dad who make life so much fun! He even provided after-camp instruction with his bb gun which was super fun for the whole family! (That McDonald's cup didn't stand a chance!)
Way to go, Joanzbenz's dad! Just make sure you don't shoot your eye out, kid.
I have no idea how old your kids are, but if your pediatrician recommends 1 hour of screen time, he or she is a prehistoric dinosaur. It's simply unrealistic. If your kids are otherwise active and healthy I wouldn't worry about it too much.
Have your babysitters disclosed their methods? Your post reminds me of my summer spent babysitting. It was the year before I started college, but my first time to babysit. The child was a little terror.
Mom left me with a list of rules - Straighten up the room every day, take your vitamins, brush your hair, brush your teeth, and stuff like that. It was stated in the unequivocal, non-optional terms that my folks used when they intended to get results, and I assumed that it was supposed to happen. Oh, and there was the rule that she had to let _me_ comb her hair before tennis lessons. That was a source of all-out war.
I didn't resort to physical punishment, but I would use anything else. I locked her in her room. I physically dragged her to the bathroom and stood in the doorway to watch her take her vitamins (otherwise she lied to me). I brought her the phone when she threatened to call her mom (and she did call her mom and got one of the worst tongue-lashings of the summer). I counted down the minutes till we had to leave the house for tennis lessons, when I refused to let her scurry around and start getting ready, picked up her shoes and tennis racket, physically loaded her into the car and locked the doors, and held her wrist so she couldn't jump out before we started moving.
It was one crazy summer for me. She told me fired me several times, but I was working for her mom, so I kept coming back. I was told I was ugly and mean (mean because during tooth-brushing sessions "she watches me," as she complained to her mom). And once she asked if she could come and live at my house because, she explained, "My parents don't really love me." She comes to our VBS and Christmas program all she can, even now, four years later, and comes running with a hug whenever she sees me. So I guess it was worth it!
Amy, great story! Thanks for sharing. I'm not sure how my babysitters are successful, but I think it's just a case where the kids know they better listen to other authority figures better than they listen to me.
Anonymous - My kids are 12 and 9 and my 12 year old is not active much at all so I think the pediatrician's recommendation of one hour of screen time reflected that. She probably also figured that if she said one hour and it stretched to two, we'd still be better off than the current 5 hours he'd happily spend in front of a screen!
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