The Rush and Thrill of that New Relationship

Nothing compares to the rush of a new relationship. Whether you're single or happily married, I would contend that we all crave the thrill of meeting someone new. Someone who has the potential of becoming an important part of our life.

Alas, because church and society frown upon romantic relationships for us married folks, we find ourselves irrevocably drawn to the possibilities of a new friendship. Don't believe me? This is actual dialogue exchanged in a recent email with a friend who had met someone special:

She: Guess what! I made a new friend! She has a son in daycare with Wally*. We had a play date this past weekend.
Me: Cool! I'm so happy for you. What did you do?
She: We hung out at the pool and then we had lunch back at my house. It was great. We really hit it off. Wally and Jimmy* played so nicely together. We talked about getting together again at her house.
Me: Has Joe* met her yet? Have you met her husband?
She: Not yet.
Me: Ooh, that's always key. Nothing worse than making a new friend but disliking her husband. Or having your husband dislike her husband. Or vice versa. These relationships are so much nicer when you can do things as a couple.
She: I completely agree. Now how long do you think I need to wait to call her about getting together again?

*Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Ah yes. You young single people may find this amusing, but trust me, once you hit 35 and you've got a couple of kids, and especially if you're living in a relatively new community, making a new friend is a big deal. If we're being honest, we all long for the days when we were five-years-old and we could walk up to a complete stranger on the beach or at the playground and say, "Hi! Wanna be friends?" Now, however, there's a delicate dance involving:

• Spouses  -- annoying? overbearing? showy? disgusting? perverted? too handsome? 
• Kids -- annoying? bratty? clingy? whiny? weepy? too smart/smarter than your kid?
• Politics -- too conservative? too liberal? Fascist? Communist? Socialist? School board member?
• Religion -- Bible thumper? End of the world alarmist? Atheist? Buddhist? Islam extremist? Devil worshiper? Church pastor?
• Eating & drinking habits -- Vegan? Vegetarian? Pescatarian? Adventurous eater? Fast food aficionado? Compulsive dieter? Teetotaler? Bud drinker?
• Interests -- opera? monster truck races? visiting historic battlefields? shooting tin cans? bowling?

Whew! Makes you dizzy just thinking about it. But still, it's worth the effort of making a match for the thrill of having someone new in your life. The intro to your spouse. The first girls' night out. First dinner out as a couple. First weekend getaway with the families. First holiday spent together. Good stuff.

Me, I've been blessed to make a couple new friends in the past year or so, and it really is all it's cracked up to be. If you're looking for ways to make new friends, I recommend the following:

• Steal Meet friends of friends. Much of the evaluation process is already taken care of for you.
• Befriend a teacher who really adores your child. It's a great source of bonding (love ya, Susan!).
• Hang out with your child's friends' parents. You've got a built-in connection, and it's always good to get to know them in case, God forbid, they're feeding your child vegetables, or teaching them how to shoot a gun. 
• Invite the new employee at work to join you for lunch. No one did this for my sister when she started with a new company this year, and I think that's just mean. I have met several good friends in the workplace.
• Bring cookies to a new neighbor. If she's skinny, this will help fatten her up and make you feel better about yourself. If she's not, you can bond over the need to lose a few pounds.

So, dear friends, two questions for your response today:

1. What do you find most thrilling about a new relationship?
2. Where/how do you recommend making new friends?

As always, thanks for sharing (and if your comment doesn't show up after my post, it's Blogger's fault. There's something screwy going on.).