You Want Me Back at Goodbye?

As a new mom, I was a big fan of baby instruction manuals. The "What to Expect" series, Dr. Spock, and Go the F**k to Sleep were of great help to me in raising my children. While childcare experts are generally all over the map in what they recommend (ex: let them cry it out vs. allow them to sleep with you until they leave for college), one thing that most everyone agrees on is the benefit of using positive reinforcement. Simply put, good behavior warrants a good response. According to Wikipedia (and my married Psych 101 prof who hit on me...creep), this concept of positive reinforcement is credited to B. F. Skinner, a researcher who "articulated the major theoretical constructs of reinforcement and behaviorism."

Today I want to recommend that corporate America study the findings of our man Skinner, and consider approaching business from a positive reinforcement perspective. This is radical and revolutionary so please forgive me if I don't post again until July because I may be busy taking calls from the Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review, Inc., Forbes, and Business Week.

So here's how all this came about.

Last week I canceled my membership to an online monthly subscription service that I joined two months ago. I gave it a try when I received a special discounted one-month offer, but because I didn't cancel on time, I was automatically billed at full price for the second month (at a rate more than double the cost of my first month). At that point, I set the old Outlook reminder and promptly canceled a couple days before I would have been charged for month three. And what did I receive in response?

Subject: Subscription Update... and a Special Offer!


Dear Kim, Your current xxx subscription has ended, and your account has been cancelled per your request. We really appreciate you using xxx, and we would be happy to continue serving you if you're still looking for xxx (now or in the future). With that in mind... *** SPECIAL OFFER FOR XXX ALUMNI *** Please use the promo code "XXX" to reactivate your xxx account today for just $5 for a month -- 67% off the regular price! ... Please feel free to contact us if you have any questions or feedback. We would be more than happy to talk with you! We hope you're having a wonderful day, and thank you again for using xxx! Many cheers, The xxx Team

So let me get this straight. If I had remained a loyal, full price paying customer, you would have been screwing ripping me off every month? But now that I have decided you're not worth it, you want me back and you're willing to put out cheapen yourself to have me?

This particular service provider is not unique in using negative reinforcement. Just call and cancel your phone, cable, internet, newspaper, magazine, etc. and see how quickly you'll get a better offer. Or stop ordering from your favorite catalog for a while and see how long it takes to receive a "We've Missed You; Take $25 Off Your Next Order" postcard. I've become so used to this approach to doing business that now I fake leaving companies just to see what they'll give me. Go ahead, call Comcast or Verizon now and give it a shot. Let me know how much you save, and then pick a date to take me out for lunch to say thanks. (I generally work at home on Fridays.)

So what am I suggesting when I say Big Business should take the positive reinforcement approach? I'm suggesting that loyal, committed customers be rewarded. Rather than waiting until I ditch you to show your appreciation, cut my rate every year that I'm a member or a subscriber. Doesn't have to be anything drastic, but imagine how impressed I would be. Imagine how many of my friends I would tell. Imagine the glowing blog post I would write about that company. In the age of social media, doing right by your customers can pay off big time. There's no better form of promotion than word of mouth. Plus, they say it's less expensive to keep your current customers than to find new ones, and I believe this positive reinforcement approach will enable businesses to do just that.

Service providers aren't the only ones who punish us for being committed and loyal. Threaten to leave your  job (assuming you're a valuable employee), and it's possible your employer might suddenly find money to pay you more. Decide to ditch your boyfriend or girlfriend (assuming you're a good boyfriend or girlfriend yourself), and said boy or girl might be willing to monitor that behavior that drives you mad. Promise to never again lift a finger to clean the house (add tears for effect) and the kids will vow to be more helpful.  At least for the next 2 hours.

What would these scenarios look like if positive reinforcement were the rule? Company gives you an unexpected bonus for good performance, not merely that pathetic 2% cost of living my ass raise. Boyfriend or girlfriend always usually acts in a way that shows you respect and consideration because they realize you're the best thing that will ever happen to them. Children help out because they know no other mommy would let them eat cake for breakfast like you do.

I'm sure you have examples of both negative reinforcement as well as some companies and organizations that get it right. Would love to hear from you!