I Blew It

"I hate this blog now. Some things should be kept private. You might be embarrassing him and hurting his feelings." --signed, A very angry son

That's the one and only comment I had on yesterday's blog post, "What We Have Here is a Failure to Communicate." When I saw the comment in my inbox, my heart sank. In my effort to make others laugh, I failed to take into account the very real possibility that what I was writing could hurt someone else.

I don't know if Ian left that comment or not. It's not really his writing style, and when I returned home from work he was his funny and happy self. I had no sense that he was angry with me. But then again, Ian's kind; he may have felt that he made his point with his comment and let it go at that.

When I write about my family, or anyone for that matter, I tease, use sarcasm, and find humor in life's everyday details. I try to write about situations and scenarios that most everyone can identify with, figuring we can all appreciate being together in this often maddening thing called life. I hope it goes without saying that NEVER do I intend to hurt, ridicule, or insult. I am guilty of the self-centered belief that because my life is an open book and self-depracating humor is my thing, others are willing to put themselves out there as well. Clearly, that is not the case.

Ian, Rob, Abby, and anyone else I have offended personally, I apologize. It was never my intent to cause you embarrassment or discomfort. I will try to never do that again.

Of course, this means I'll probably have to quit blogging because I've just eliminated 75% of my writing material...

COB Syndrome

My friend Emily and I were talking the other night about our children and our blogs. Emily's son Noah informed her that Ian has to get my permission before I'm allowed to blog about him and Noah wants the same consideration. I need to clarify. First, I only ask Ian permission for Facebook posts related to him (after apparently damaging his fragile ego in the past), and second, permission requests only apply in the case of very sensitive subjects. I do have parental embarrassment rights, after all. If you take away a mom's ability to embarrass her children, what else has she got?


During this conversation, Emily did raise a legitimate concern. What if they organize? Form some sort of union or protection agency? Knowing our bright children, this could happen. Ian's always looking for someone to sue. It's just a matter of time before he decides to take me to court for psychological damages resulting from my Facebook and blog posts.

I can see it now. A whole generation of children will seek restitution and therapy for COB Syndrome, an affliction that strikes Children of Bloggers. Here are some of the symptoms of COB syndrome:

• A paranoid sense that people are talking about you, people you may have never even met
• A naked, exposed feeling which leaves you emotionally hyper-sensitive and vulnerable
• A Jekyll-Hyde personality that both craves attention and fears it at the same time

When asked on college applications and in future job interviews, "Tell me about yourself," COBs will likely respond in short, pithy phrases, often exhibiting inappropriate humor, raw emotion, and self-deprecation. COBs will assume that they're supposed to entertain you with whatever they have to say. If their words elicit no response, they will feel like failures.

COBs will follow in a long and distinguished line of children messed up by their well-intentioned parents, but I think they're still better off than the generations of kids with parents and grandparents of the Depression era who insisted that you always "clear your plate" thus ensuring you would forever battle your weight.

Now before I veer off into discussions of healthy eating habits and the power of good looking doctors, I will close with this question:

Do you think COBs will be more psychologically sound because everything about them is out there in the open, or do you think we're slowly destroying them by making them objects for our amusement? Your response could prove critical in the fight against COB syndrome.