- "mature" rated video games and R-rated movies
- cell phones and Facebook
- make-up and certain clothing
- dating, parties, and curfews
- Harry Potter, Hunger Games, and Twilight series
- tattoos and piercings
- the evening news
Many parents think kids today grow up too fast, are exposed to too much, too soon, and are stressed by the need to keep up, take the fast track, play varsity and go Ivy league--all starting in preschool. I get that. There are definitely elements of childhood today that leave me scratching my head, frustrated, and disappointed at the expectations we put on kids, and at the places they want to go, the things they want to see, and the stuff they want to do at such a young age.
But then there's 5th grade chorus.
Last night I attended our elementary school's 5th grade choral concert. And it was there that I decided it's possible to go too far in the other direction. Away from rushing our kids into maturity and instead treating them like kindergartners. When Ian was in 5th grade chorus, he hated it. His friends hated it. What could be so bad about chorus, you ask? Well, it might be the song choices (can you say "Casey Jones" and "Yankee Doodle Dandy"?). It might be the choreographed movements and poses. Perhaps it's the plastic toy train whistle. Or maybe it was the silly warm up, photo opp faces that the director required before beginning the performance. Truly, the only thing missing in this concert were matching Garanimals outfits and patent leather shoes.
I know I'm being harsh. I know the teacher means well and thinks she's doing right by these kids, but I also see her turning them off to singing. I find it amazing that any of these students voluntarily join choral groups when they get to the middle school. I'm not proposing they start performing Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, 50 Cent, or Ke$ha, but there's got to be something in between that the kids can relate to, get into, and actually enjoy singing and performing. And most likely it isn't a song that was written in 1902.
Teaching students and raising children is no easy task. We want them to stay innocent, sweet, and unblemished by reality. But we also want them to grow up to be confident, strong, and independent. We're always seeking a balance between what's right and what's fair, what's popular and what's appropriate.
5 comments:
I hear ya! Some of those items on your list are on mine as well. I think I've decided that trying to teach them to be DISCERNING is key. Our big issue right now is which music/artists are appropriate for our 10YO to be listening to. I don't want to ban certain artists and make them even MORE enticing to Maddy. However, I want HER to be able to listen to a song and ask herself, "What message are they promoting here?" and "Should I be taking this in or should I change the channel?" Man. Tough stuff. Remember when we thought the terrible twos were hard?
I'm laughing at your reaction to the song choices for the chorus concert....could it be the result of too much Glee viewing....did you go into the evening anticipating "Don't Stop Believin'" or "True Colors"? Too funny!
It's funny you mention more up to date songs. I went to Jillian's 4th grade choral concert. Surpringly, among the selections were Party in The USA, Firework by Katy Perry and We are The World. I was hoping for Blow by Kesha as the encore but was disappointed....
No "Blow" by Ke$ha over here either, but our 5th grade chorus did sing "Eye of the Tiger" and "Fireflies". It was great. Time to put the WayBack Machine way back in the closet with the Garanimals clothes!
I find that when it comes to issues of discernment for these kinds of permissions and taboos, I can't even be unilateral with my 3 kids. One can handle violence but not scary/horror; one can handle adult humor but not violence; the third--well, if I were smart, I'll restrict him to G-rated animated Disney of the 1950s!
But one thing I do know for sure: regardless of what I (or others) expose my kids to, I need to be responsible for talking with them about the content--whether it is fiction (movies/music/TV) or nonfiction (news/overheard conversations/observed behaviors). If I can get them asking questions about the behavior or language or ideas, then I improved my chances of raising adolescent and adult children who will be equipped in discernment themselves!
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