Yes, I'm so vain that I will wear my best-looking jeans that are too damn tight in the waist, and just leave them unbuttoned if the top I'm wearing will cover it. (What stinks is when you go to unbutton them later, after a meal, and find they are already unbuttoned and you've got nowhere to go. I haven't actually started unzipping in public, so I clearly haven't yet hit my personal low.)
This vanity of mine recently got me in trouble with a Freakin' Angel whom we shall refer to as Angel "K." Angel K saw my New Year's Eve facebook post in which I noted I needed a new outfit so I could compete with the hostess (Rob's still recovering from his "Good luck with that" response.) Angel K scolded me for:
- Feeling the need to impress
- Having friends who would care what I looked like
Angel K's scolding has left me feeling conflicted. Of course she's right that true friends don't care what you wear (and I should note that my hostess at that NYE party was not the type to judge me) and we should never feel the pressure to keep up with the Jones. But on the other hand, is it wrong to want to look our best, and occasionally dress to impress?
The reality is that I'm not usually particularly concerned about my appearance. Anyone who's seen me running through the neighborhood in mismatched pajamas while chasing the dog is well aware of this. But sometimes, vanity gets the best of me and I think it would be delightful to turn a few heads.
The really important question to consider is this: Do I continue to squeeze myself into my current size and maintain my self-esteem, or should I embrace a larger size and the joy that comes with being able to breath freely with buttons and zippers and waistband intact? I welcome your opinion on this critical matter.
2 comments:
I think you need to take another perspective on this whole issue. I think it comes down to feeling good in what you are wearing - not the physical part (although that is important too) but the emotional part. No one can dispute that when you feel good mentally in an outfit, it makes the event that much more enjoyable bc it adds an extra element of confidence in your attitude and an extra swagger in your walk...
I weighed my words carefully before responding (no pun intended!). Here's what I think: No harm at all in wanting to look (and feel) good about yourself. Also no harm at all in embracing the fullness of who you are becoming--even if that means a fuller figure! If the skinny jeans are a product of being unable to embrace the 40-and-fabulous season of life, get rid of them. If, however, the weight gain is a symptom of melancholy or stress, treat the cause and the symptom will undoubtedly be addressed as well.
Just remember: We who love you, love ALL of you, including the unbuttoned or unzipped versions!
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