On Saturday I tested for my 2nd degree black belt at World Class Martial Arts. It was three hours of hell requiring 800 jumping jacks, 400 sit-ups, 200 push-ups, and 100 leg extensions. And that was just the cardio stuff designed to break us. Add to that line drills, sparring, self-defense, break falls, forms, and breaking boards and concrete, and you might excuse my taking timeout to hyperventilate and cry during the three-hour torture treatment.
Even after all that, if I ever regain use of my legs and hips, I'll return to training.
Yes, there's a part of me that screams over the pain in my thighs, "You're getting too old for this. Do something more gentle." But the reality is, I can't stop. Part of it is the fear that if I stop, all the calories and fat I've eaten for the past 40 years will catch up with me overnight and I'll wake up weighing a minimum 300 pounds. If I stop training I'll have to stop eating cheese steaks and nachos and trade in beer for water in order to save calories. No one wants that.
Another reason I need to keep training is for the emotional release it provides. For less than the cost of seeing a therapist, I can kick and punch my troubles away and burn calories in the process. Just ask my family, if I don't go t o class for several days, I'm really not fit to live with. It's that important for my mental health.
The friendships I have at World Class Martial Arts are also a driving force behind my being there. Our wildly diverse family is wonderfully supportive, encouraging, and simply fun to be a part of. Danielle, Steve, Phil "the Animal," Wild Bill, Mr. Pete, Jane, John, Chip, Muneer, Jen, Chris, Anthony, LeeAnn, and of course Master Aaron. Another host of heavenly Freakin' Angels in my life.
These are all excellent reasons to continue at WCMA, but the number one reason I stay with this sport that occasionally tortures me while I train? The challenge. It forces me out of my comfort zone, but does so in a way that manages to keep me going.
The reality is that Tang Soo Do is the first thing in my life I've ever stuck with that I'm not particularly good at. For the past 40 years, I've quickly quit everything that didn't come easily to me. Tried skiing once. Loved it. Tried skiing a second time, icy conditions scared me to death, I was a wreck. Haven't tried it since. That's pretty much my M.O. When the going got tough, Kim got going. I've been blessed to be reasonably good at enough things that no one seemed to notice what a quitter I was.
Sticking with Tang Soo Do even though it doesn't come easy to me and often brings out the worst in me was originally about setting a good example for my children. Now it's about having one thing in my life that continues to challenge me and make me stronger. And it's something that's completely within my control. Economics don't dictate my success as they do in my career. Tween hormones don't wreck havoc with my performance as they do at home. The amount of sugar in the students doesn't determine my effectiveness as it does in my Sunday school class. No, what happens during a Tang Soo Do class depends completely on what I bring to the table. Some nights its my fears, insecurities, and self-doubt (and those nights are ugly). Other nights it's anger and frustration that drive me (and those nights it's great to be sparring). Often, it's simply the relief of knowing I'm in a safe, supportive place that makes WCMA the best place for me to be.
Everyone needs their own WCMA/Tang Soo Do, something, someone, or someplace which challenges you and drives you to be better than you think you can be. What does it for you?
2 comments:
Miss Kim, you're my hero! You embody the meaning of TSD: Indomitable spirit, perseverence, intergrity, humility, etc. Also, you're better than you think. You proved such on Saturday. I'm so proud of you and I knew you could do it!
Btw, what breaks did you have to do? Miss LeeAnn won't tell me but she said she was very impressed!
And BTW, I read this after your insecurity post. Those other readers just need to grow up. They will be you someday, as much as they may protest it now while they're ROTFLTAO at you. Chin up, girlfriend. You can kick their donkey butts to China and back. Not that you would :) Many hugs from your fellow over-40 madre in arms who's low-carbing it and down 40 pounds in 4 months. Never thought I had it in me.
Post a Comment